Through her first 15 months, with various family and extended family members. :)
First 15 months of my grand-daughter :)
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Monday, May 7, 2012
Love is a wonderful thing
I had to go to the doctor today. Yesterday, I started experiencing a sharp, stabbing-like pain in my lower back on the left (in the general vicinity of where my kidney is), and given that I only have one functioning kidney, I'd rather be safe than sorry, so I went to get it checked out.
What I didn't expect was to meet an elderly couple who were also there for an appointment (the husband was). When they arrived, the office staff hadn't yet returned from lunch. The husband took off his jacket, hung it up, and patiently waited for his wife to hand him her jacket as well, and dutifully hung it up for her. She patted him on the back, thanked him, and said to me, "He's such a gentleman." I told her that he was part of a dying breed of man, and that she shouldn't let him get away.
As we chatted, it became more and more apparent just how very much in love with each other they still are. They will have been married 59 years next month. They renewed their vows on their 50th anniversary in the church in which they'd been originally married. The husband commented that they had to renew their vows because their original marriage license was only good for the first 50 years. I commented back that they had another 41 to go.
While her husband was confirming his appointment with the receptionist (who was teasing him about who he'd brought with him - his mistress, a girlfriend, etc.), I told the wife that she really had found a good one, and she got such a twinkle in her eye as she replied that yes, she had indeed. When he returned to his seat next to her, they held hands.
They were an absolutely *adorable* couple. When I was called in for my appointment, I wished them many more years of happiness together, and thanked them for being who they are.
And you know... one might think that a simple conversation with a couple strangers wouldn't have much of an impact on anyone's day, but seeing the two of them together, so obviously in love still, after 59 years together... it really made my day. It warmed my heart to a point where I actually teared up a bit a couple times while talking with them.
What I didn't expect was to meet an elderly couple who were also there for an appointment (the husband was). When they arrived, the office staff hadn't yet returned from lunch. The husband took off his jacket, hung it up, and patiently waited for his wife to hand him her jacket as well, and dutifully hung it up for her. She patted him on the back, thanked him, and said to me, "He's such a gentleman." I told her that he was part of a dying breed of man, and that she shouldn't let him get away.
As we chatted, it became more and more apparent just how very much in love with each other they still are. They will have been married 59 years next month. They renewed their vows on their 50th anniversary in the church in which they'd been originally married. The husband commented that they had to renew their vows because their original marriage license was only good for the first 50 years. I commented back that they had another 41 to go.
While her husband was confirming his appointment with the receptionist (who was teasing him about who he'd brought with him - his mistress, a girlfriend, etc.), I told the wife that she really had found a good one, and she got such a twinkle in her eye as she replied that yes, she had indeed. When he returned to his seat next to her, they held hands.
They were an absolutely *adorable* couple. When I was called in for my appointment, I wished them many more years of happiness together, and thanked them for being who they are.
And you know... one might think that a simple conversation with a couple strangers wouldn't have much of an impact on anyone's day, but seeing the two of them together, so obviously in love still, after 59 years together... it really made my day. It warmed my heart to a point where I actually teared up a bit a couple times while talking with them.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
The most heart and eye-opening article you're likely to ever read
It is the single most inspiring blog article I've ever read. The title of it will very likely stop many people from reading it, and they're the ones who need to read it most, IMO.
http://www.danoah.com/im-christian-unless-youre-gay.html
And if you, by chance, do go and read the blog, make sure you read some of the comments as well, as some of them are just as inspiring and wonderful to read.
The author also posted several powerful responses to his original article.
http://www.danoah.com/category/im-christian-unless-youre-gay/
There's even a 6-minute (just under) video on youtube called "It Gets Better - I'm Christian, unless you're gay - Responses Video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3rGZ-8c_14&feature=share
Read the stories. Watch the video. Open your mind, your heart, your world.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Hello, yeah, it's been awhile... Not much, how about you?
Yeah, it's been awhile since I last posted anything. Other than working, watching my grand-daughter grow (she had her first birthday at the end of January), hanging with friends on occasion, playing WoW & SWTOR,, reading, watching movies, playing or snuggling with my cats, there's not a whole lot going on.
I'm definitely on a relationship hiatus. Last one burned me badly. Not going anywhere near another intimate relationship anytime soon, that's for sure. This is not to say I've given up hope of ever finding someone who will treat me right and not turn out to be just another asshat, but I'm just not interested in going there right now.
I'm definitely on a relationship hiatus. Last one burned me badly. Not going anywhere near another intimate relationship anytime soon, that's for sure. This is not to say I've given up hope of ever finding someone who will treat me right and not turn out to be just another asshat, but I'm just not interested in going there right now.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Saying goodbye
This is the beginning of a long and sordid tale... one filled with anger, sadness, remorse, and bitterness, yet also with hope. It's my hope, first and foremost, that by blogging all that I'm experiencing (recently and currently), it'll help me heal sooner and move on to something MUCH better.
To give a bit of additional insight into all this, the person who is the primary focus of this saga is an inactive LDS male, 21 years my junior, that I had been in a serious, intimate relationship with (on and off) for three and a half years. The last year and change, pretty much all aspects of intimacy were null and void.
The beginning of the end started on September 13, 2011. In reality, it had started LONG before that, but the final "end" came to a crashing halt on that evening. That was the night my former boyfriend told me the lie that would end our relationship, and spark an enormous amount of anger and frustration that had been building for two and a half years. We'd broken up (for the third time) in June, 2010. Yeah, I know. What was I thinking? I was unfortunately following my heart (like I'm very prone to do) instead of listening to my mind that was screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" We'd attempted to remain "friends". One good thing about that third break-up, though. I wasn't taking anywhere near as much of his shit as I had previously when we were together. He didn't like what I had to say most times after that last break-up, because at that point, I was pissed off enough from all the previous hurts and injustices he'd doled out on me that I really didn't care that he couldn't handle hard truths.
There had been many lies that he'd told me, and secrets he kept from me. Had I been smarter about it (and not so in love with the little douchebag), I would've dumped his sorry ass when I exposed his first round of secrets back in December of 2008.
Of course he apologized. Of course it would never happen again. Of course I should trust him again. Uh. huh. Yeah, right. But I loved him, and I gave him another chance, hoping beyond hope that because I'd caught him once like this, if he really loved and respected me as he claimed he did, he *wouldn't* do it again. Unfortunately, the same thing happened several more times while we were still a couple. He'd been lying to so many people (his parents, his best friend) for so long, it was easy for him to lie to me. Looking back on all that went down between us, I honestly don't know what to make of him. I felt like a girlfriend of convenience, more times than not, as I seemed to rarely show up on his priority list when we weren't physically in the same location together.
The first time we broke up, we were on vacation and having an absolutely fabulous time. Driving back home, he was driving my car, and I was somewhat bored due to an overall lack of conversation at the time. So I picked up his cell phone and started poking through his text messages. He didn't seem to have any issue with me doing that until I came to the conclusion that he'd lied to me about who he'd gone out to lunch with just prior to us starting our vacation. He claimed he'd gone out to lunch with his best friend and his best friend's wife. What I managed to piece together (and he finally admitted) was that he'd actually gone out to lunch with his ex-girlfriend. He lied to me about it because he knew I wouldn't like it. Yeah, DUH. Ya think, dumbass? But lying about it then having the truth be exposed is supposed to be better??? Maybe in YOUR version of reality, dude.
The biggest reason I detested his ex-girlfriend so much is because when they were together, she cheated on him many times. She had even propositioned his best friend, telling him, "Oh... he doesn't have to know." When she broke up with him, she did so by showing him the engagement ring her (now) husband had given to her while they were apart. She ripped out his heart and did a skank dance all over the shredded pieces of it.
Now anyone who knows me knows I do NOT like people who cheat on their significant others. I have ZERO use for cheating scumbags. They deserve a special place in Hell right along with rapists, pedophiles and murderers. But I digress.
So he tells me that I'm a snooping bitch for having caught him in yet another lie. I told him that may be so, but he's a lying sack of shit. Then he tells me that that's it. We're done. I was so completely blindsided by that, I couldn't even look at him. All I could do was cry. And cry. And cry some more.
About ten days later, I found out I was pregnant. I debated on whether or not to tell him at all. I'd raised my daughter pretty much on my own, I could do it again if I had to. I did eventually tell him, and that's when yet another ding to my self-esteem came out. I was "good enough" to be with if I had his child, but on my own merits, there was no reason for him to be with me. So because of the baby, we were "back together". I lost the baby just over 9 weeks into the pregnancy. It devastated me. I was still in love with him, but I wasn't good enough to be his girlfriend anymore. Oddly enough, he was very supportive as I tried to cope with all the changes my body and hormones were going through after having lost the baby.
So the second break-up occurred an hour after we'd made love and had been making all sorts of proclamations of how much he loved me. Then he drops the bomb. "I've met someone and there might be something more than friendship brewing," he says. I even guessed who it was on the first try. I wasn't about to let him have his cake and eat it, too. He still wanted "us" to continue while he pursued this other gal. Ummmm... HELL NO.
What pissed me off to NO end about this particular break-up is the dumbass didn't even wait 24 hours after I "released" him from our relationship. He went out with her that SAME FREAKING DAY. In fact, it was a little less than 4 hours later that he was out on a date with the desperate horse mouth. Desperate, because, like him, she's LDS, and at the ripe old age of 25, she was running out of time to find herself a husband, get her sorry, stupid ass sealed to some lying asshat in the LDS Temple, and start popping out a bazillion kids. Horse mouth, well, because this girl LOVED to show off pictures of herself with her huge-assed tongue hanging out of her equally huge-assed mouth. I've seen snakes who can't detach their jaws as wide as this chick opens her gaping pie-hole.
So yeah... he loved me loved me loved me. So much so that he couldn't even take a freaking breath before moving on to the "next best thing". The girl appears to have an IQ less than that of a wooden stump (which would've worked out great, since that boy-toy of mine was no rocket scientist himself), and she's already indoctrinated deeply in the (false) belief system of the Mormon church. I'll write another blog on my issues with what the LDS church teaches at a later time.
Not only was I pissed off when his best friend's wife told me that the he and horse mouth had gone out that day (How did she know? Well, she and her husband had just bought a new house and the two "something is brewing" idiots decided to go over to their house and help them paint). He didn't even bother ASKING if they'd mind if he brought over his new chica... turns out, they were NOT happy with him for having done that either.
I reamed him a good one for his rampant act of stupidity, not to mention making me feel like our relationship truly didn't mean diddly squat to him. He had so little regard for me that he couldn't wait to start making plans to eventually get into horse mouth's pants.
She was all giddy on her Facebook page about having had SUCH an awesome time with SUCH a great guy that day. I railed at him for his stupidity leak some more, and apparently, so did his best friend, because he broke things off with her real quick, claiming he still loved me. And like the lovesick idiot that I was, I took his sorry ass back.
Our last "back together" journey as a couple was relatively short-lived... only a couple months. At that point, I was sick of dealing with all the lies and my heart had been broken too many times. Our last vacation together cemented things for me that he would just continue hurting me for as long as he could until a more viable candidate for marriage came along. After that vacation together, I'd become somewhat numb to the effects of his hurtful lies and secrets. We never really said the words, "We're breaking up", but it was pretty much a given. We stayed in touch... still talked a lot, but the intimacy was well gone.
Like anyone trying to recover from a broken heart, I had my good days and bad days. The longer we were "just friends", the good days were more frequent than the bad days.
About 7 months ago, a girl (also LDS) he'd dated (for three whole weeks!!! WOOHOO!) in high school friended him on Facebook. He told me, "She's the only girl I ever regret dumping." Unthinking, dumb-assed thing to say to someone you'd been dating for 3+ years, but that's par for the course with him. He didn't think before he spoke, and many times, he didn't consider me/my feelings on the matter before he went and did something he knew would hurt me, because what HE wanted was always at the top of his priority list.
He adamantly stated numerous times to me, "I screwed things up once with this girl. I'll be damned if I'm going to do it again." But he recently did JUST that. This girl from his past was assaulted. Whoops! Won't be getting in her pants anytime soon. He told her, "I'll wait for you, but not too long." I'm sorry, but he'd been pursuing her quite actively for 7 freaking months, and something bad happens to her and he bails???? WTF!?!??!! But wait... there's more!
A week after he tells her this, another woman enters the picture. This other woman is married to a non-Mormon... she'd been with her husband for 4 years (only one of those years as man and wife). She used to be LDS, but while dating her husband, she came to realize what a farce the Book of Mormon really is, and that the "One True Church on this Earth" is based on lies from the top on down. She'd had a couple miscarriages in recent months, and I do believe that that had a large part in the crumbling apart of her marriage. She claimed, "I want the Lord back in my life" and "He (her husband) will never accept my religion." Big surprise, that, because anyone with half a brain knows what a crock "your" religion is, bimbo brain. So to prove just how much she wants the Lord back in her life, she goes and moves in with my ex-boyfriend. He'd told me she was going home, to her family. In California. Imagine my surprise when her husband called me and asked me to verify where my ex-boyfriend lived, because that's where he was instructed to send all her shit.
So... I called the ex-boyfriend and told him what a lying sack of shit he was. He called me "the ruiner of lives". I laughed at him, and said, "Um, no. You're doing that ALL on your own." So now they're boinking like bunnies, living in sin, going to Church and acting like everything's hunky-dory in delusion land. One problem, dipshit. She's still legally married!!! Hello?!? ADULTERY. That's a sin. And since he's gone through the Temple (prior to his mission and such), he really should know better than to throw one of God's (and his church's) biggest sins in everyone's face and pretend like they're being all chaste. Bullshit. If they were, why would he suddenly tell the gal he'd been pursuing for the previous 7 months, "No, sorry, I just want to be friends now." (coinciding, I'm certain, with the nookie brigade with the cheating ho of a wench that's looking for the Lord in her life. I can assure you, you delusional twit, being an adulterous bitch with the opportunistic, lying sack of shit you're with is NOT the way to go about it. If she was serious about getting the Lord back into her life, she WOULD have gone home to her family and not be oh-so-deserving of a Scarlet Letter and a reservation in that special place in Hell I mentioned earlier.
To add even more cloak and dagger behavior to my relationship with my former boyfriend... in the entire time we dated, his parents never knew I existed. We had a couple close run-ins with them on occasion, but they never knew for certain their son was getting a little something-something. But they do now. I had told him a couple years ago that there would be some serious repercussions if he ever pushed me too far. He did that. His parents know about me now.
But, you know... it shows just how fucked up some folks in the LDS church are. His parents don't seem to be all too upset that he lied to them for years (before me, and while with me and after me) and they don't seem terribly put out that he's living with and boinking an already married woman. Because, well, you know... if they ignore that little fact (that she's still legally married and all), the little "problem" will eventually go away. And then the two deceitful, delusional wonders can get married properly in the temple, seal themselves to each other, and then have to put up with each other's shit for the rest of their mortal and eternal lives. I told him that they really shouldn't breed, because there's more than enough stupidity and psychotics in the world already.
People have asked me why I still care. I've asked myself that as well. Probably because I'd invested 5 years of my life to him, and while he very successfully killed off any romantic love I ever had for him, I still care about his sorry ass and want him to not be such a chronic fuck-up.
I'll get over it eventually. I always do. I'm nothing, if not resilient.
To give a bit of additional insight into all this, the person who is the primary focus of this saga is an inactive LDS male, 21 years my junior, that I had been in a serious, intimate relationship with (on and off) for three and a half years. The last year and change, pretty much all aspects of intimacy were null and void.
The beginning of the end started on September 13, 2011. In reality, it had started LONG before that, but the final "end" came to a crashing halt on that evening. That was the night my former boyfriend told me the lie that would end our relationship, and spark an enormous amount of anger and frustration that had been building for two and a half years. We'd broken up (for the third time) in June, 2010. Yeah, I know. What was I thinking? I was unfortunately following my heart (like I'm very prone to do) instead of listening to my mind that was screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" We'd attempted to remain "friends". One good thing about that third break-up, though. I wasn't taking anywhere near as much of his shit as I had previously when we were together. He didn't like what I had to say most times after that last break-up, because at that point, I was pissed off enough from all the previous hurts and injustices he'd doled out on me that I really didn't care that he couldn't handle hard truths.
There had been many lies that he'd told me, and secrets he kept from me. Had I been smarter about it (and not so in love with the little douchebag), I would've dumped his sorry ass when I exposed his first round of secrets back in December of 2008.
Of course he apologized. Of course it would never happen again. Of course I should trust him again. Uh. huh. Yeah, right. But I loved him, and I gave him another chance, hoping beyond hope that because I'd caught him once like this, if he really loved and respected me as he claimed he did, he *wouldn't* do it again. Unfortunately, the same thing happened several more times while we were still a couple. He'd been lying to so many people (his parents, his best friend) for so long, it was easy for him to lie to me. Looking back on all that went down between us, I honestly don't know what to make of him. I felt like a girlfriend of convenience, more times than not, as I seemed to rarely show up on his priority list when we weren't physically in the same location together.
The first time we broke up, we were on vacation and having an absolutely fabulous time. Driving back home, he was driving my car, and I was somewhat bored due to an overall lack of conversation at the time. So I picked up his cell phone and started poking through his text messages. He didn't seem to have any issue with me doing that until I came to the conclusion that he'd lied to me about who he'd gone out to lunch with just prior to us starting our vacation. He claimed he'd gone out to lunch with his best friend and his best friend's wife. What I managed to piece together (and he finally admitted) was that he'd actually gone out to lunch with his ex-girlfriend. He lied to me about it because he knew I wouldn't like it. Yeah, DUH. Ya think, dumbass? But lying about it then having the truth be exposed is supposed to be better??? Maybe in YOUR version of reality, dude.
The biggest reason I detested his ex-girlfriend so much is because when they were together, she cheated on him many times. She had even propositioned his best friend, telling him, "Oh... he doesn't have to know." When she broke up with him, she did so by showing him the engagement ring her (now) husband had given to her while they were apart. She ripped out his heart and did a skank dance all over the shredded pieces of it.
Now anyone who knows me knows I do NOT like people who cheat on their significant others. I have ZERO use for cheating scumbags. They deserve a special place in Hell right along with rapists, pedophiles and murderers. But I digress.
So he tells me that I'm a snooping bitch for having caught him in yet another lie. I told him that may be so, but he's a lying sack of shit. Then he tells me that that's it. We're done. I was so completely blindsided by that, I couldn't even look at him. All I could do was cry. And cry. And cry some more.
About ten days later, I found out I was pregnant. I debated on whether or not to tell him at all. I'd raised my daughter pretty much on my own, I could do it again if I had to. I did eventually tell him, and that's when yet another ding to my self-esteem came out. I was "good enough" to be with if I had his child, but on my own merits, there was no reason for him to be with me. So because of the baby, we were "back together". I lost the baby just over 9 weeks into the pregnancy. It devastated me. I was still in love with him, but I wasn't good enough to be his girlfriend anymore. Oddly enough, he was very supportive as I tried to cope with all the changes my body and hormones were going through after having lost the baby.
So the second break-up occurred an hour after we'd made love and had been making all sorts of proclamations of how much he loved me. Then he drops the bomb. "I've met someone and there might be something more than friendship brewing," he says. I even guessed who it was on the first try. I wasn't about to let him have his cake and eat it, too. He still wanted "us" to continue while he pursued this other gal. Ummmm... HELL NO.
What pissed me off to NO end about this particular break-up is the dumbass didn't even wait 24 hours after I "released" him from our relationship. He went out with her that SAME FREAKING DAY. In fact, it was a little less than 4 hours later that he was out on a date with the desperate horse mouth. Desperate, because, like him, she's LDS, and at the ripe old age of 25, she was running out of time to find herself a husband, get her sorry, stupid ass sealed to some lying asshat in the LDS Temple, and start popping out a bazillion kids. Horse mouth, well, because this girl LOVED to show off pictures of herself with her huge-assed tongue hanging out of her equally huge-assed mouth. I've seen snakes who can't detach their jaws as wide as this chick opens her gaping pie-hole.
So yeah... he loved me loved me loved me. So much so that he couldn't even take a freaking breath before moving on to the "next best thing". The girl appears to have an IQ less than that of a wooden stump (which would've worked out great, since that boy-toy of mine was no rocket scientist himself), and she's already indoctrinated deeply in the (false) belief system of the Mormon church. I'll write another blog on my issues with what the LDS church teaches at a later time.
Not only was I pissed off when his best friend's wife told me that the he and horse mouth had gone out that day (How did she know? Well, she and her husband had just bought a new house and the two "something is brewing" idiots decided to go over to their house and help them paint). He didn't even bother ASKING if they'd mind if he brought over his new chica... turns out, they were NOT happy with him for having done that either.
I reamed him a good one for his rampant act of stupidity, not to mention making me feel like our relationship truly didn't mean diddly squat to him. He had so little regard for me that he couldn't wait to start making plans to eventually get into horse mouth's pants.
She was all giddy on her Facebook page about having had SUCH an awesome time with SUCH a great guy that day. I railed at him for his stupidity leak some more, and apparently, so did his best friend, because he broke things off with her real quick, claiming he still loved me. And like the lovesick idiot that I was, I took his sorry ass back.
Our last "back together" journey as a couple was relatively short-lived... only a couple months. At that point, I was sick of dealing with all the lies and my heart had been broken too many times. Our last vacation together cemented things for me that he would just continue hurting me for as long as he could until a more viable candidate for marriage came along. After that vacation together, I'd become somewhat numb to the effects of his hurtful lies and secrets. We never really said the words, "We're breaking up", but it was pretty much a given. We stayed in touch... still talked a lot, but the intimacy was well gone.
Like anyone trying to recover from a broken heart, I had my good days and bad days. The longer we were "just friends", the good days were more frequent than the bad days.
About 7 months ago, a girl (also LDS) he'd dated (for three whole weeks!!! WOOHOO!) in high school friended him on Facebook. He told me, "She's the only girl I ever regret dumping." Unthinking, dumb-assed thing to say to someone you'd been dating for 3+ years, but that's par for the course with him. He didn't think before he spoke, and many times, he didn't consider me/my feelings on the matter before he went and did something he knew would hurt me, because what HE wanted was always at the top of his priority list.
He adamantly stated numerous times to me, "I screwed things up once with this girl. I'll be damned if I'm going to do it again." But he recently did JUST that. This girl from his past was assaulted. Whoops! Won't be getting in her pants anytime soon. He told her, "I'll wait for you, but not too long." I'm sorry, but he'd been pursuing her quite actively for 7 freaking months, and something bad happens to her and he bails???? WTF!?!??!! But wait... there's more!
A week after he tells her this, another woman enters the picture. This other woman is married to a non-Mormon... she'd been with her husband for 4 years (only one of those years as man and wife). She used to be LDS, but while dating her husband, she came to realize what a farce the Book of Mormon really is, and that the "One True Church on this Earth" is based on lies from the top on down. She'd had a couple miscarriages in recent months, and I do believe that that had a large part in the crumbling apart of her marriage. She claimed, "I want the Lord back in my life" and "He (her husband) will never accept my religion." Big surprise, that, because anyone with half a brain knows what a crock "your" religion is, bimbo brain. So to prove just how much she wants the Lord back in her life, she goes and moves in with my ex-boyfriend. He'd told me she was going home, to her family. In California. Imagine my surprise when her husband called me and asked me to verify where my ex-boyfriend lived, because that's where he was instructed to send all her shit.
So... I called the ex-boyfriend and told him what a lying sack of shit he was. He called me "the ruiner of lives". I laughed at him, and said, "Um, no. You're doing that ALL on your own." So now they're boinking like bunnies, living in sin, going to Church and acting like everything's hunky-dory in delusion land. One problem, dipshit. She's still legally married!!! Hello?!? ADULTERY. That's a sin. And since he's gone through the Temple (prior to his mission and such), he really should know better than to throw one of God's (and his church's) biggest sins in everyone's face and pretend like they're being all chaste. Bullshit. If they were, why would he suddenly tell the gal he'd been pursuing for the previous 7 months, "No, sorry, I just want to be friends now." (coinciding, I'm certain, with the nookie brigade with the cheating ho of a wench that's looking for the Lord in her life. I can assure you, you delusional twit, being an adulterous bitch with the opportunistic, lying sack of shit you're with is NOT the way to go about it. If she was serious about getting the Lord back into her life, she WOULD have gone home to her family and not be oh-so-deserving of a Scarlet Letter and a reservation in that special place in Hell I mentioned earlier.
To add even more cloak and dagger behavior to my relationship with my former boyfriend... in the entire time we dated, his parents never knew I existed. We had a couple close run-ins with them on occasion, but they never knew for certain their son was getting a little something-something. But they do now. I had told him a couple years ago that there would be some serious repercussions if he ever pushed me too far. He did that. His parents know about me now.
But, you know... it shows just how fucked up some folks in the LDS church are. His parents don't seem to be all too upset that he lied to them for years (before me, and while with me and after me) and they don't seem terribly put out that he's living with and boinking an already married woman. Because, well, you know... if they ignore that little fact (that she's still legally married and all), the little "problem" will eventually go away. And then the two deceitful, delusional wonders can get married properly in the temple, seal themselves to each other, and then have to put up with each other's shit for the rest of their mortal and eternal lives. I told him that they really shouldn't breed, because there's more than enough stupidity and psychotics in the world already.
People have asked me why I still care. I've asked myself that as well. Probably because I'd invested 5 years of my life to him, and while he very successfully killed off any romantic love I ever had for him, I still care about his sorry ass and want him to not be such a chronic fuck-up.
I'll get over it eventually. I always do. I'm nothing, if not resilient.
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